Just because it is hard to do, does not mean it is impossible to achieve
You've raised your children and now they're off to school, married, or taken a job in another part of the country. Your longtime 'job' in your married life is complete (although they are always your children, and you are always their parent).
But the tempo of life has changed. You're no longer central. The continual conversation with your spouse, "How are the kids doing?" is no longer an everyday event. You have to discover the "we" again.
Maybe once you looked forward to having more time for romance, sex, social life. But now you're confused about how to make the shift, or afraid your partner doesn't really want to. His job hasn't gone to college. Maybe even an affair is in the making.
You can't go back, but you can go forward with help. Just knowing that the rocky passage is normal and will end is helpful. Sometimes you need to come in with your partner to have those all-too-familiar arguments with someone who will help you stop, listen to each other, and reflect.
A relationship is always a balancing act, each partner compromising, and when your life situation changes in a big way, for whatever reason, that balance will change too. It can feel like the bottom's falling out. Maybe it is, maybe it isn't.
You don't want to give up without trying. The things you looked forward to — more time, peace, and maybe romance — can still happen.
There's a lot to talk about. Give me a call so we can begin.
Photos above by permission of Getty Images — download, republication, retransmission, reproduction, or other use, of these images prohibited.